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· Silver Bullet member
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36,347 Posts
As for New Years Eve - Not Too Damned Happy!

Signs You’ve Had Too Much Holiday Cheer

1. You strike a match and light your nose.
2. You take off your shoes and wade in the potato salad.
3. You hear a duck quacking and it’s you.
4. You tell your best joke to the rubber plant.
5. You refill your glass from the fish bowl.
6. You hear someone say, “Call a priest!”
7. You start kissing the portraits on the wall.
8. You complain about the small bathroom after emerging from the closet.
9. You ask for another ice cube and put it in your pocket.
10. You tell everyone you have to go home… and the party’s at your place.
11. You have to hold on to the floor to keep from sliding off.
12. You pick up a roll, and butter your watch.
13. You yawn at the biggest bore in the room… and realize you’re in front of the hall mirror.
 

· Gold Bullet Member and Noted Curmudgeon
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102,202 Posts
Roger that, John. We have (and will continue to) stay home this night. Besides, Carlie has picked up some sort of bug and wouldn't enjoy going out even if i was inclined to risk drunks in cars to go somewhere.
 
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